You are going on a first date and wondering whether you should plan it or play it by ear. Well, let me ask you a question: What do you think will be more likely to make a good impression?
Why a Man Shouldn’t Play It by Ear on a First Date
If a man goes on a first date and says they are going to “Play it by ear,” it will make a wrong first impression because it shows that he did not bother making any plans. It is better to plan a first date because showing effort will be more impressive and likely to make the date go more smoothly.
First dates are all about making an excellent first impression, or at least if you hope to get a second date out of it, they are. I always plan the first date and put thought into it. What does it say about a man who doesn’t plan a first date?
What Play it By Ear Says About You.
When I ask women about planning a first date, they often mention the word effort. They think a guy who plans a date puts in effort, and they appreciate that. This stance means when a man doesn’t have a plan, it signals that he doesn’t put in effort. I think a first date warrants taking the time, sitting down, and making a plan. It doesn’t have to be complicated or spectacular. Just plan something.
Maybe you think not planning a date is spontaneous, but perhaps she thinks it’s laziness. A spontaneous, unplanned date might be ok after you have been seeing each other for some time or if it was an impromptu, last-minute date. Otherwise, it is always good to have a plan; it just increases the chances of having a better time and eliminates the possibility of mishaps.
Here is an example: if you go to a nice restaurant without reservations, you might not get a table if it is very busy. I live in New York, where it is impossible to get a table in certain restaurants without a reservation. I have another post if you are interested on Why You Should Make Reservations for a First Date.
Planning the Date is a Safe Bet
When you play it by ear, there is a higher chance of things going wrong. You may also disappoint your date; not making plans can seem apathetic and lazy. It is better to look like you are prepared rather than like you didn’t bother.
Making plans for a date shows interest and preparedness. Making a plan is an excellent step toward a good first impression because it helps show that you are responsible and take initiative. Go with the flow sounds nice, but it also sounds like don’t bother. Who wants to date a guy that doesn’t bother?
One important thing you need to consider when deciding whether to plan the first date is that you should both dress appropriately for whatever you are doing. Whether you go for drinks at a dive bar or dinner at a fancy restaurant, that might affect how you dress. Women especially like to take their appearance seriously (and so should you). If you tell her where you are going, it will make her outfit choice easier. These little things distinguish between making a wrong first impression and a good one.
Planning the Date
It is good practice for the man to plan the first date. I personally like to plan all the dates; it makes me feel good and makes the woman I am dating feel good, too. If you want to read more about why a man should plan dates, I have another post you can look at on Who Should Plan the First Date.
Stop Playing It By Ear on Dates.
Playing it by ear is never going to be the best date policy. I strongly suggest you think about what to do in advance and have some kind of plan for your date. It is always better to put in a little more effort rather than too little effort. Good luck planning your next date.
